D’var Torah: Yitro 2026/5786 יתרו
Ilan Sperber ‘25
When I studied Parshat Yitro I thought about many life lessons. For this Shavuon, I want to focus on one connected to asking for help in order to take care of others as well as ourselves.
Once Yitro has arrived at the encampment of the Children of Israel, he observes how Moshe spends his day. Yitro saw that Moshe was the only one who would answer all of the questions that the children of Israel had and the only one who would judge their disputes. Yitro saw that Moshe sat dispensing judgment and counsel all day every day. 24-6. He was wearing himself out. He had no time to hang out with his family, or do anything else he wanted to do. Yitro says to him:
מָֽה־הַדָּבָ֤ר הַזֶּה֙ אֲשֶׁ֨ר אַתָּ֤ה עֹשֶׂה֙ לָעָ֔ם מַדּ֗וּעַ אַתָּ֤ה יוֹשֵׁב֙ לְבַדֶּ֔ךָ וְכָל־הָעָ֛ם נִצָּ֥ב עָלֶ֖יךָ מִן־בֹּ֥קֶר עַד־עָֽרֶב׃
"What is this thing that you are doing for the people? Why do you sit alone while the entire people station themselves before you from morning until evening?"
And after Moshe explained that he is sitting in judgment all day. Yitro says:
לֹא־טוֹב֙ הַדָּבָ֔ר אֲשֶׁ֥ר אַתָּ֖ה עֹשֶֽׂה׃
"The thing you are doing is not good.
נָבֹ֣ל תִּבֹּ֔ל גַּם־אַתָּ֕ה גַּם־הָעָ֥ם הַזֶּ֖ה אֲשֶׁ֣ר עִמָּ֑ךְ כִּֽי־כָבֵ֤ד מִמְּךָ֙ הַדָּבָ֔ר לֹא־תוּכַ֥ל עֲשֹׂ֖הוּ לְבַדֶּֽךָ׃
You will surely wither away, both you and this people who are with you, for the matter is too heavy for you; you will not be able to do it alone.
Ok. What is Moshe’s problem? Moshe’s problem is that he cannot or will not ask for help. Yitro helps him even though he didn’t ask for help. (Parents like to do that!) So Yitro tells Moshe to split the responsibility of judging into a hierarchy of different groups overseen by different judges, and with Moshe at the top for people to bring the really difficult cases. God tells Moshe to listen to his father-in-law. But I have a lot of questions.
Why hasn’t God offered an opinion on the structure of the judiciary?
Why didn’t God tell Moshe what to do before Moshe tries to do it all on his own?
How come Moshe himself didn’t think of a larger system and was judging by himself? - did Moshe just care so much about every person and family?
I think that Moshe needed to learn to delegate and understand that even though he was so smart and knew the Torah directly from God, he didn’t know everything. Not knowing everything is ok.
Rashi, in his commentary on the entire TaNakh says: איני יודע - I don't know 77 times! I don’t understand the meaning of this. Why would Rashi not just leave those instances blank? He doesn’t comment on every single word or phrase. Why does he sometimes choose to tell his reader-student that he doesn’t know?
Rashi is following a famous Talmudic passage. The Talmud Berakhot 4a teaches in the name of Mar:
לַמֵּד לְשׁוֹנְךָ לוֹמַר ״אֵינִי יוֹדֵעַ״, שֶׁמָּא תִּתְבַּדֶּה וְתֵאָחֵז.
Accustom your tongue to say “I do not know,” lest you become entangled in a web of deceit.
Ironically, the Talmud learns this from Moshe. But even Moshe had to learn how to put this into practice.
Pirkei Avot 4:1 asks:
אֵיזֶהוּ חָכָם, הַלּוֹמֵד מִכָּל אָדָם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר מִכׇּל־מְלַמְּדַ֥י הִשְׂכַּ֑לְתִּי
Who is wise? One who learns from everyone. As it says: From all my teachers I gained enlightenment;
Yitro advises several qualifications for judges:
וְאַתָּ֣ה תֶחֱזֶ֣ה מִכׇּל־הָ֠עָ֠ם אַנְשֵׁי־חַ֜יִל יִרְאֵ֧י אֱלֹהִ֛ים אַנְשֵׁ֥י אֱמֶ֖ת שֹׂ֣נְאֵי בָ֑צַע
And, from all the people, you shall look for Anshei chayil –capable people who are Yerei Elokim - God-fearing, Anshe Emet - people of truth, and Sonei Batza haters of unjust gain
Why those qualifications for judges? - and are these inherited or earned?
It would seem that while we may learn these from our parental upbringing, all of these characteristics need to be developed over time.
These qualifications make the judges worthy partners for Moshe because they are people who can learn from Moshe, as well as teach him. While they may not be as great as Moshe, Moshe can still learn from them. Because they are dealing with the same types of questions, quarrels and court cases as Moshe does but have different personalities, they will surely deal with them in different ways. Having a diversity of judges in the hierarchy that Yitro suggested would allow for a well-organized and self-evaluating good society.
Yitro helped Moshe make it easier for him to judge the Israelites by having him share that responsibility with others. Although the Torah doesn’t explicitly say so, I would like to believe that Moshe appreciated the help. Asking for help can be very hard to do, but it is a very important thing that we must do in life because if we ask for help, and accept the help, then we will appreciate it a lot and grow as people.
Another way to look at Yitro’s advice to Moshe about not being able to do all the work alone, is that by asking for help, Moshe would be taking care of himself. Getting help will basically save himself from constant stress which might lead him to get frustrated or have a short temper. This, in my opinion, is a VERY important thing to remember because it is a win-win. You are caring for yourself by asking for help with something, and when you do that you are more likely to be able to also help and care for others.
