D’var Torah: Vayetzei 2025/5786 ויצא

Margalit Bresman, Grade 8

This week we read parshat Vayetzei. In last week's parsha, Yaakov steals the birthright from his brother Esav. In this week's parsha, Yaakov runs away to Haran. While on his journey, he has a dream where he sees angels going up and down a ladder and God promises to continue  the covenant that was made with his fathers. Yaakov comes to Haran and meets Lavan, Rachel and Leah. Yaakov wants to marry Rachel but Lavan tricks him so he ends up marrying Leah. Yaakov works for another seven years and then finally gets married to Rachel.

Leah, Leah’s maidservant, and Rachel's maidservant have 10 kids. After Rachel has her first child, Yaakov asks Lavan to go back to his father’s home. Lavan agrees, and Yaakov and his family leave. Later, Lavan finds out that Yaakov tricked him and took more sheep than he was supposed to. Lavan is angry and chases after them but God tells Lavan not to hurt Yaakov.

They make a covenant on a stone and then Lavan says goodbye to his children and leaves. Yaakov names the place Mahanayim, meaning double camp.

Something that interested me was the vow between God and Yaakov. God says to Yaakov: “I am God, the God of your father Avraham and the God of Yitzhak.” After promising Yaakov land and children, God says “I am with you: I will protect you wherever you go and will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.” In the morning, Yaakov anoints a stone. After he does this, Yaakov makes a vow saying:   

“If God remains with me, protects me on this journey, and gives me bread to eat and clothing to wear, and I return safely to my father’s house, then God shall be God to me.”

This quote from Yaakov is very controversial because he seems to be adding conditions onto God's vow. That could mean that Yaakov is selfish and that is a big problem because Yaakov should be a role model for us.

Some rabbis explain it in a way where Yaakov does not look selfish. For example, 13th century commentator Ramban says it’s a grammar problem: the word im does not indicate a doubt in the matter… that is to say, ve’im does not mean “if it occurs,” but rather “when it occurs.”

Rabbi Yitzchak Etshalom, a Los Angeles based Bible scholar, identifies the problem this way: “Why is Ya’akov phrasing it conditionally – “if God will be with me…” – isn’t he fully confident that God will fulfill His promise?” That means: If Yaakov is supposed to be a father to our people, shouldn't he believe what God says?

I have another idea. Instead of Yaakov lacking faith or being selfish, I think that he is just clarifying the vow that God made. How is God going to protect Yaakov? Yaakov thinks that protecting him means getting food and clothing and returning to his father’s house. Yaakov knows that understanding what God means is important, so he is saying this for clarification.

I relate to this because sometimes I need clarification when I get directions. When I am in school, I want to understand things clearly, so I often ask questions. This isn’t because I don’t have faith in my teachers, and I don’t think I’m being selfish for asking. My questions aren’t conditions, they’re just clarifications.

In Yaakov’s case, it doesn’t mean he didn’t have faith in God. Yaakov would be even more likely to need clarification because God is speaking to him. If I were Yaakov, I think that I would be pretty overwhelmed by God speaking to me. In fact, he may have just been so overwhelmed that the directions were not his first priority. He says: “Why, God is in this place, and I, I did not know it! He was awestruck and said: "How awe-inspiring is this place!” Then he goes into his clarification.

I think that the Rabbis assuming that Yaakov is being selfish is kind of overthinking it. God didn’t get mad at Yaakov or take back the vow or tell Yaakov he’s asking for too much. God didn’t judge Yaakov so maybe we shouldn’t either. This parsha teaches us that we should be patient with one another, rather than judge; my hope for our community is that we will continue to welcome questions when others have them.